Voice of Ukraine

From: Ira Kapitonova in Kyiv (Day 694):

‭‭For the Lord will not forsake his people;
he will not abandon his heritage;
for justice will return to the righteous,
and all the upright in heart will follow it.
Psalm‬ ‭94:14‭-‬15‬

We had to go into the basement twice today, and it was the third day this week. Each time, it was because of the missile launcher taking off in Russia.

Every time we get an air raid while at school, I have mixed feelings, to describe it mildly:

• Anger because our kids don’t deserve it
• Belief in God’s faithfulness in the darkest of times
• Concern about how long the air raid might last and how our kids would be able to handle it
• Defiance because we are resolved to do our best, basement or not
• Envy because so many kids around the world can have ordinary lives and school days
• Frustration because I need to figure out how to continue the interrupted lesson
• Gratitude because we trust our air defense
• Helplessness because there’s nothing I can do about it
• Indifference because it’s become part of our routine
• Relief because it’s just a plane taking off, not bombs falling on our heads
• Thankfulness because we have a relatively comfortable basement
• Weariness from this constant need to be alert

I don’t know if you noticed, but I put my feelings in alphabetical order (and I could have come up with one for each letter, but I didn’t want to overwhelm you). I couldn’t think of another way to present them because I do experience all of these emotions at the same time. It’s not even a roller-coaster anymore — it’s an insane merry-go-round that leaves you dizzy as you desperately try to make sense of it.

However, once the air raid is over, life gets back to normal, and you feel flustered about that wild mix of emotions you experienced a few moments ago.

I don’t know if this rambling post makes any sense. I guess it’s my attempt at making sense of today’s insanity.